Online Dating Scams and Romance Fraud: How to Check If Someone Is Who They Say They Are

You met someone online. The conversation flowed easily. They seem almost too good to be true — attentive, articulate, interested in everything you say. But something feels slightly off. Their profile photos are almost too polished. Their story has small gaps. They are always just out of reach.

Romance fraud is one of the fastest growing forms of financial crime. Victims lose not only money but trust, dignity, and in many cases significant savings built up over a lifetime. Knowing how to protect yourself — and how to verify who you're really talking to — has never been more important.

The Scale of Romance Fraud

Millions of pounds are lost to romance scams every year in the UK alone. The victims are not naive or foolish — they are often intelligent, educated people who were simply targeted by sophisticated, professionally run operations. Many fraudsters operate from overseas, running multiple personas simultaneously across dating platforms.

Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

• They refuse video calls or their video always has technical problems
• Their profile photos reverse-search to a different name or stock image site
• They claim to work abroad — on an oil rig, in the military, as an engineer on overseas contracts
• The relationship escalates very quickly to declarations of love or deep connection
• They eventually ask for money — for an emergency, a travel ticket, a business problem, a medical bill
• They ask you to communicate outside the dating platform early on
• They become evasive or emotional when you ask direct questions about their life

How to Verify Someone You Met Online

There are basic steps anyone can take. Reverse image search their photos. Search their name alongside their claimed employer or location. Ask for a video call and pay attention to whether the person on screen matches the photos they have sent.

But professional verification goes much further. A PI can run a full identity check on an individual — cross-referencing their claimed name, employer, location, and background against verified sources. We can identify whether a person exists as they claim to, flag inconsistencies, and in many cases confirm whether a profile is fraudulent before any further damage is done.

If You Think You Have Already Been Defrauded

Report it to Action Fraud and your bank immediately. Do not send further money regardless of how convincing the explanation is. And consider speaking to a private investigator — not to recover money directly, but to build a documented case that supports a police report and, in some cases, legal action.

Protecting Elderly or Vulnerable Family Members

Romance fraud disproportionately targets older adults and those who are lonely or recently bereaved. If you are concerned that a family member is involved in an online relationship that doesn't feel right, a discreet investigation can establish the facts without damaging your relationship with them.

Contact us confidentially to discuss your concerns. No judgement, no pressure — just honest advice.